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#TEE09 Tech*Ed and feeling guilty

Over the years I\’ve had several reasons to feel guilty whilst attending Tech*Ed. For many years the conference co-incided with both my wife\’s birthday and our wedding anniversary – I missed 7 or 8 of those. Although on others she came to Amsterdam or Barcelona to celebrate there.

Many years ago I declined a request to be someone\’s godfather because the christening was whilst I was at Tech*Ed. But to be fair it was also because I thought they were desperately seeking a Catholic (much lapsed as I am), and I have 1 special godson, and I wanted to keep it 1:1 special.

But this year scales new depths of guilt for me. Just over a week ago a special woman, a friend and fellow Marillion fan (along with her husband Mark); Jayne died. Today, Monday is her funeral, and I won\’t be there. I\’ve spoken to Mark quite a bit since, he knows why, understands and thinks I should be here too.

But I feel such a shit for not being there. Mark knows I am there in spirit, but…

Jayne\’s favourite Marillion song Beautiful is being played at her service. I\’ll be listening to that a few times today. If you are reading this do me a favour – hop over to Spotify or iTunes or http://www.marillion.com or whatever, find Beautiful (from Afraid of Sunlight) and hit play. And say a prayer for Jayne and her husband Mark. He\’ll be having a really shit day today – and I can\’t help feeling guilty for making it just a smidge worse…

By P J Bryant

Ramblings of a freelance IT Consultant working for some nice SME's, large organisations, resellers and the usual friends and family! Bit of

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